Nearly every religious tradition we humans have ever developed has had some way of describing the concept of there being a true, authentic self (who we really are), and a false self (who we are conditioned to appear to be).  There are different terms used for these two states of being, yet there is no disagreement that most of us live most of the time in the form of our false self.  In fact, to make it all a bit more confusing, we not only live in the form of our false self, we think that it is our true self.

Yet don’t we all feel, at one time or another, that there’s something … missing?  Don’t we have an inkling that there’s something not quite right in our lives?  Even if it’s only when we find ourselves awake in the middle of the night wondering how we got to where we are in our lives, why we’re not able to be as happy as we think we should be, why things don’t seem to “fit” any better than they do.

Those knowledgeable in the ways of the spirit say that this dissonance, this disconnection we feel is the result of cracks forming in the façade of our false self, allowing our true selves to shine through.  Simply put, that feeling that something isn’t quite right is because … something isn’t quite right.

There is a well-known, and perhaps over-used, quotation from the writing of Marianne Williamson:

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, ‘Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?’ Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

I find the light/good, dark/bad dichotomy problematic, although I think you could also say that it’s the dark, cool, comfort of living in harmony with ourselves that frightens us more than the harsh glare of our attempts to project a false image onto the world.  Either way, though, her reminder that our “playing small” doesn’t do anything good for anyone.  Including ourselves.

So who are you when you aren’t playing small?  Who are you when the spotlights are turned off and you’re alone with the reality of your life?

This fall we’ll be exploring issues and questions of identity in both our Children’s Chapel and Sanctuary worship – as well as in other aspects of our community life.  So turn off (or on) the light and see what is real about you.  We are tremendously, and tragically, hampered when we don’t know ourselves for who we really are; knowing this is foundational to any other true growth.  So let’s explore this together over the next three months.

Pax tecum,

RevWik